Ludicrous Light Wars
Last Changed: Thursday, 09-10-15.
…Li’l ol’ Ames, Iowa, ain’t bad.
Bad is Ankeny, Iowa, 20 miles south of Ames, a ‘burb of Des Moines. It is an SOBs (Satan Of Brightness) world of wonder, beacon of brightness, but a dark sky night terror, and sleep disruption horror house! BIG BOXERs galore! Thousands of acres of car $tealerships, er…dealerships, thousands of cars and gigawatts of big bright business bulbs blazing all night long, 24 / 7/ 365.25!
Why? Well, the answer this ol’ stargeezer got when I asked the question: “Some cuss-omer might wanna shop for a car at 3 am!” HOG HOCKEY! Note the image [sic] of Ankeny at night… Yes, the image is visible…think about it. Imagine trying to sleep in Ankeny!
Ludicrous light wars are aided ‘n abetted by compliant and pliant business / corporate owned civic officials, politicians, etc. And silent local yokels won’t / don’t fight back, so Ankeny is all mall ‘n sprawl, endless parking lots, strip malls, no downtown, no main street, endless developments of beige houses, beige apartments, beige condos, beige townhouses, beige people, living beige lives, in a light-soaked, sleepless, insomniac, sleep-deprived, beige community(?). Title of movie: SLEEPLESS IN ANKENY!
But hey, it’s alllll goooood…Jobs! Jobs! Jobs!
Gotta keep that $hame-ber of Commerce engine of economic development chuggin’ on down the tracks at full throttle-up. Gotta keep the developers developin’. Factories facturin’. Frackers frackin’ (Drill, Baby, Drill! Frack, Baby, Frack!). Industry industrious. Crapitalism crapitalized. Subsidies subsidized. BIG agribusiness and the Farm Bureau boys Feedin’ the World — more correctly, Poisonin’ and Pollutin’ the World. The free-market, free-enterprise (neither free) marketing and enterprising. Gotta keep the whole sliced ‘n diced, sleep-slaying, Syphilized System hustlin’ at light speed, warp speed, full speed, full throttle-up! You do remember what happened moments after the words, “Roger, go at full throttle-up!” were spoken on January 28, 1986, don’t you?
Shuttle Challenger and crew died! Think about it!
Gotta grow, grow, grow…Bigger is better! More is best! Whoa, that’ll sure set off Ol’ Lush Limpballs and his Dittoheads, won’t it?
Sure hope those O-rings (O-blah-ma rings) hold.
Tonight, every night, America will be ill-luminated [sic] by the glare ‘n glow of millions of sleep-slaughtering light fixtures, spraying light up, out, all about, erasing starlight! And thousands more so-called dark sky friendly lights will be added as you read this paragraph, despite all the light laws and ordnances [sic] and other so-called light pollution solutions advocated by the dark sky orgs and astromagazines!
Good golly, Miss Molly, how I love Jack Hammerin’!
THERE IS A BETTER WAY! Nature’s Way! NLO! Nature’s Lighting Ordinance!
NLO! MAKE IT SO!
Challenge: Show me one light, one single light proposed and erected (remember, mostly by men) that provides safety and security for The Others, all the Other species who share Earth with us and upon whom we depend for everything. EVERYTHING!! Go ahead, make my day! Show me one lousy light!
Chew on Aldo Leopold’s words: “A thing (light) is right when it tends to preserve the integrity, the stability, and beauty of the biotic community (night sky). It is wrong when it (light) tends otherwise.” Aldo’s land ethic. An ethic that certainly speaks for sleep.
Leopold was / is only one of thousands of writers, artists, activists, actionists, etc., who have publicly fought the corporate cowards who hide behind their deep Darwinian (survival of the fittest… words Darwin never used) business beliefs.
The dark sky orgs and astromagazines enable light blighters, the SOBs, Satans Of Brightness, to steal starlight and erode starry nights with their unholy, sleep-stealing night lights.
They repeat their dogma (sheepma?): Lights are good if they’re dark sky friendly, use the right wattage, don’t trespass on others’ property, shine down, use proper technology, and obey light laws, etc. Blah, blah, blah!
But the enablers never reveal truth: Whether dark sky friendly or not, more lights equal more light pollution. And there WILL be more lights, thousands more lights, erected every day and turned on every night to steal sleep ‘n starlight, unless you stop the SOBs.
UNLESS YOU STOP THEM!
Do you really believe that the current cockamamie, hair-brained schemes and wild-eyed dreams devised and disseminated by the dark sky orgs and astromagazines are working? Do you? Well, DO YOU?
FEWER LIGHTS = STARRY NIGHTS! AND STARRY NIGHTS = SLEEPY NIGHTS!
Derrick Jensen: “We have been too kind to those who are destroying the planet (night sky). We have been inexcusably, unforgivably, insanely kind.”
Yes, we’ve been too kind. I have been too kind!
Humans, grow up! Neither science, technology, crapitalism, religion, money, government…, nor wishin’, hopin’, and prayin’, will ever solve the problems humans make for themselves, including light pollution and sleep disruption.
So, Stargeezer, what will work? An Extinction Button?